I'm officially bored. I spent all day waiting for Chick to come home. The kids have been a terror lately. Hank is in a 'clingy' mode and Mo, well, Mo is two so she won't listen to me unless I'm holding a jar full of cookies. So, I thought we could all do something this evening to relieve the tension. Or at least my tension. Thanks to thunderstorms, that really didn't happen. I ran a few errands - okay, I went to the liquor store and Wendy's - while Chick played with the kids. Then we watched Handy Manny and an Elmo potty training video and everyone went to bed. Except me.
The Reds are winning 2-1 and they have the bases loaded right now so that could change. Never mind.
If you haven't read the Captain's Blog, you really should. There is a link to it in the previous Garden post. He's in Myrtle Beach on vacation with his family. Apparently there is a KISS Coffee House. That's marketing at its best. Not only can they charge way too much for a cup of coffee they can dress it up to seem really cool. I've got to try the Caramel Rockuccino.
Bronson Arroyo Rules! (Yeah, some of you know what that means.)
I'm nearly ready for football season. I've already participated in a fantasy mock-draft. Of my five baseball teams, two are doing very well, one is in the hunt and I've just about given up on the last two. That's the way it goes. I'm not sure how many football teams I'll have this season - five is a good bet. But fantasy football is a lot easier and a lot more luck. It's like golf - you can have a great weekend but if someone you're playing does better, you lose.
Did you know that Elmo was from Louisiana? At least his dad is, as he has a definite cajun accent. And who takes that many pictures of your kid on the toilet? Maybe that's my problem. I need to take the camera into the bathroom. Then I can post the photos in an entirely new blog - motinklesandpoops.blogspot.com!
Actually, my problem may be that I've seen that damn video too many times! Next time Mo asks to watch it - and she does often - I'm just turning on Star Trek.
Friday, July 27, 2007
Thursday, July 26, 2007
Captain's Blog
Recently I have been watching Star Trek Enterprise. It's a prequel to the entire Star Trek series as the first earth ship to explore space. It features Captain Jonathan Archer played by Scott Bakula of Quantam Leap fame. It's on every afternoon at 1:00 on HDNet. I record it and if the kids take a nap at the same time I can usually fit in the whole episode. DVR is awesoome.
I am not a Trekker. I have always enjoyed watching the various Stark Trek shows but that is where my involvement ends. I do not show up at conventions dressed as a Ferengi. I do not know how to speak Klingon. And I have not told anyone to 'live long and prosper' since I was a kid. I certainly don't have any problem with people who do those things. It's a relatively harmless hobby. It seems that the only people Trekkers ever come in contact with are other Trekkers. What could go wrong?
In the original Star Trek series the sex symbol of the show was Lt. Uhura. Her great legs were always exposed thanks to a super-mini skirt. Of course, she was often trumped by a hot green chick hooking up with Captain Kirk. The Next Generation featured Deanna Troi as the sexy star. But I always thought Beverly Crusher was better looking. She just didn't show cleavage. However, none of those women are in the same category as T-Pol played by Jolene Blalock on Enterprise. She's a puffy lipped, large breasted Vulcan that wears a skin-tight uniform. She may not be the reason I watch the show, but it sure makes it more worthwhile.
I have a friend who was known as the Captain in college. His last name is Kirk so it worked well. He actually prefers Star Wars to Stark Trek but gladly accepted the nickname. He has recently started his own blog to detail his voyage down the highway as his family takes a summer vacation. Apparently, the captain's of the various Enterprises never knew how easy they had it. You can check out the Captain's Blog here.
Live long and prosper.
I am not a Trekker. I have always enjoyed watching the various Stark Trek shows but that is where my involvement ends. I do not show up at conventions dressed as a Ferengi. I do not know how to speak Klingon. And I have not told anyone to 'live long and prosper' since I was a kid. I certainly don't have any problem with people who do those things. It's a relatively harmless hobby. It seems that the only people Trekkers ever come in contact with are other Trekkers. What could go wrong?
In the original Star Trek series the sex symbol of the show was Lt. Uhura. Her great legs were always exposed thanks to a super-mini skirt. Of course, she was often trumped by a hot green chick hooking up with Captain Kirk. The Next Generation featured Deanna Troi as the sexy star. But I always thought Beverly Crusher was better looking. She just didn't show cleavage. However, none of those women are in the same category as T-Pol played by Jolene Blalock on Enterprise. She's a puffy lipped, large breasted Vulcan that wears a skin-tight uniform. She may not be the reason I watch the show, but it sure makes it more worthwhile.
I have a friend who was known as the Captain in college. His last name is Kirk so it worked well. He actually prefers Star Wars to Stark Trek but gladly accepted the nickname. He has recently started his own blog to detail his voyage down the highway as his family takes a summer vacation. Apparently, the captain's of the various Enterprises never knew how easy they had it. You can check out the Captain's Blog here.
Live long and prosper.
Saturday, July 14, 2007
Thursday, July 12, 2007
Parenthood
Although I have seen the movie numerous times and always enjoyed it, only recently have I been truly able to appreciate the movie Parenthood. For those of you that are unfamiliar with it, the story is essentially a comedy about the raising of children. The main character, Gil, portrayed by Steve Martin, struggles to balance his career with the raising of his three kids. His wife Karen is played by Mary Steenburgen. His father, Frank, is Jason Robards. His siblings include characters portrayed by Dianne Wiest, Tom Hulce and his brother-in-law Rick Moranis.
The events that take place in the movie are all about how the different parents react to what their children do. Nothing is really extraordinary. One scene involves a birthday party when a stripper shows up instead of a cowboy. Another involves sorting through trash at a restaurant for a retainer. Still another involves a school play completely disrupted by a younger sibling. My own children are still too young for me to have gone through any of this, but in a strange way I do look forward to it.
Karen: He likes to butt things...with his head.
Nathan: How proud you must be.
A few days ago our frog died. The tree frog in the terrarium not the dwarf frog in the aquarium - I know it can be confusing. Anyway, the frog died. I'm not really sure why he died, but he's been alive for over two years. We got him just after we moved here. I know one thing for sure - he did not starve to death. The day before he died I put a few crickets in the tank and they are still there. As a matter of fact, they are thriving in the environment and chirping all day long to let us know how happy they are. They are also very good at hiding. I HAVE to get another frog, and soon.
Frank: (on parenting) It's like your aunt Edna's ass. It goes on forever and it's just as frightening.
Amongst our gazillion toys there is a number puzzle. It's not really a puzzle though. It's just a bunch of pieces cut in a strange way with numbers on them. Each number has objects associated with it. There is one kite and five snails. The strange thing is the number two. There are two suns. Not stars - definitely suns. The last time I checked we only had one sun in our solar system. I'm not really sure how many planets there are anymore, but one sun. Yet there are TWO suns in the puzzle. Now, unless my kids go to school on Tatooine, they are always going to be wrong when asked how many suns we have.
Karen: I happen to LIKE the roller coaster, okay? As far as I'm concerned, your grandmother is brilliant.
Gil: Yeah if she's so brilliant why is she sitting in our NEIGHBOR'S CAR?
Sometimes it can be difficult to gauge the development of children. Hank is completely off the bottle and just about finished with formula altogether. That's about the same pace as Mo. However, he is very close to walking which puts him months ahead of his sister. Mo can count to ten fairly easily and works through the alphabet. But only in English. We're working on Spanish and I'm going to have to learn French. We help her with all of those things, and more, but she may learn the most from TV. Blue's Clues and Sesame Street go a long way, but honestly I think she learns the most from The Price Is Right. She knows exactly how many bottles of antacid to buy to get between ten and twelve dollars. And she loves counting along with the Mountain Climber. Unfortunately, she'll never be able to count past 25.
Marilyn Buckman: Cool is adorable. Adorable! Why didn't you write us when you had a son?
Larry Buckman: I didn't know myself until a couple of months ago. You see a few years ago, I was living in Vegas with this girl. Show girl. She was in that show 'Elvis On Ice'. Anywho, we drifted apart as people do in these complicated times and then a couple of months ago, she shows up with Cool and tells me "You watch him. I shot someone. I have to leave the country."...That's a parent?
This is not the first reference to Parenthood in the Garden. I honestly had to do a keyword search to figure it out, but on January 19, 2005 I quoted the movie in a post. You should check that out as it too deals with parenting. Just in case you don't have time, here's the quote, the best of the movie:
Tod: You know, Mrs. Buckman, you need a license to buy a dog, to drive a car - hell, you even need a license to catch a fish. But they'll let any butt-reaming asshole be a father.
The events that take place in the movie are all about how the different parents react to what their children do. Nothing is really extraordinary. One scene involves a birthday party when a stripper shows up instead of a cowboy. Another involves sorting through trash at a restaurant for a retainer. Still another involves a school play completely disrupted by a younger sibling. My own children are still too young for me to have gone through any of this, but in a strange way I do look forward to it.
Karen: He likes to butt things...with his head.
Nathan: How proud you must be.
A few days ago our frog died. The tree frog in the terrarium not the dwarf frog in the aquarium - I know it can be confusing. Anyway, the frog died. I'm not really sure why he died, but he's been alive for over two years. We got him just after we moved here. I know one thing for sure - he did not starve to death. The day before he died I put a few crickets in the tank and they are still there. As a matter of fact, they are thriving in the environment and chirping all day long to let us know how happy they are. They are also very good at hiding. I HAVE to get another frog, and soon.
Frank: (on parenting) It's like your aunt Edna's ass. It goes on forever and it's just as frightening.
Amongst our gazillion toys there is a number puzzle. It's not really a puzzle though. It's just a bunch of pieces cut in a strange way with numbers on them. Each number has objects associated with it. There is one kite and five snails. The strange thing is the number two. There are two suns. Not stars - definitely suns. The last time I checked we only had one sun in our solar system. I'm not really sure how many planets there are anymore, but one sun. Yet there are TWO suns in the puzzle. Now, unless my kids go to school on Tatooine, they are always going to be wrong when asked how many suns we have.
Karen: I happen to LIKE the roller coaster, okay? As far as I'm concerned, your grandmother is brilliant.
Gil: Yeah if she's so brilliant why is she sitting in our NEIGHBOR'S CAR?
Sometimes it can be difficult to gauge the development of children. Hank is completely off the bottle and just about finished with formula altogether. That's about the same pace as Mo. However, he is very close to walking which puts him months ahead of his sister. Mo can count to ten fairly easily and works through the alphabet. But only in English. We're working on Spanish and I'm going to have to learn French. We help her with all of those things, and more, but she may learn the most from TV. Blue's Clues and Sesame Street go a long way, but honestly I think she learns the most from The Price Is Right. She knows exactly how many bottles of antacid to buy to get between ten and twelve dollars. And she loves counting along with the Mountain Climber. Unfortunately, she'll never be able to count past 25.
Marilyn Buckman: Cool is adorable. Adorable! Why didn't you write us when you had a son?
Larry Buckman: I didn't know myself until a couple of months ago. You see a few years ago, I was living in Vegas with this girl. Show girl. She was in that show 'Elvis On Ice'. Anywho, we drifted apart as people do in these complicated times and then a couple of months ago, she shows up with Cool and tells me "You watch him. I shot someone. I have to leave the country."...That's a parent?
This is not the first reference to Parenthood in the Garden. I honestly had to do a keyword search to figure it out, but on January 19, 2005 I quoted the movie in a post. You should check that out as it too deals with parenting. Just in case you don't have time, here's the quote, the best of the movie:
Tod: You know, Mrs. Buckman, you need a license to buy a dog, to drive a car - hell, you even need a license to catch a fish. But they'll let any butt-reaming asshole be a father.
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