QUEENB 1

We pulled up in the gas station today and stopped behind a silver Dodge Durango. It wasn’t long before I noticed the license plate in front of me read ‘QUEENB 1’. I really have no problem with personalized license plates. They can be a nice personal touch to a vehicle. My father used to have the plate ‘MEAT 1’ on his Porsche. He earned his fortune as a butcher, so the plate worked for him – regardless of the insinuation. But before I could think about it too much, a kid, about 15 or so, got out of the passenger side door and walked over to the pump. The first thing I noticed about the kid was that he wore only a sweat jacket over a t-shirt. And it was snowing. As he approached the pump…

“Hey! Don’t get that all over my car!”

The ‘mother’ had opened her door and noticed that her son wasn’t quite doing something right. He had flipped the lever before putting the nozzle in the tank.

“You hear me?! You better listen to me?!”

As I sat and watched the boy hold onto the nozzle as he filled his mothers tank, well, I thought about writing about the experience. Why? I don’t know. I just feel something for the kid. In the eight minutes that I noticed him in his life, he never lifted his head once. The reality may be that he is problematic and his mother just picked him up from detention and she’s trying to give him some discipline. Yeah – that could be the answer. But I think that his mom is just a bitch who thinks she had kids just so they could do things that she doesn’t want to do. Like pump gas when it’s twenty degrees outside.

I have said before that having children is the most selfless and the most selfish act any person can make. Obviously, there are numerous sacrifices to make when raising a child. I am completely aware of the fact that in just a few months my world is going to be turned completely upside down. But on the other hand, I want my child to be the best example of everything that Chick and I can put into him or her. I want to make the kid a little ‘Chick.’ That would be perfect. But unfortunately, people take that concept to an extreme.

The best way I can end this stupid little drama is with a quote from the movie Parenthood: “…you need a license to buy a dog, to drive a car – hell, you even need a license to catch a fish. But they’ll let any butt-reaming asshole be a father.”

Or in this case, a mother.