Nightswimming

Tonight is perfect for skinny dipping. I just finished mowing the lawn and am working on a cheap bottle of wine. Mo and Chick are already upstairs and will be sleeping soon. The air is just the right temperature. Now all I need is a pool.

A pool is an integral part of skinny dipping. There is a pond at the front of our sub-division. It appears to be nice and clean but it's not really tempting enough to risk a night in jail. We have a new Elmo sprinkler that shoots water in all directions. But running around naked in the backyard isn't the same as swimming. At least not until I finish more of this wine.


"Oh, you always give people extra things Mr. McFeely!" - Mr. Rogers


I don't have any reason as to why I haven't planted much in the Garden the last few months. I haven't really been busy or doing anything different in my life. Actually, I have been on the lookout for some things to write about. Like the other day when I was behind a catering van on my way home from getting a Banana Mocha Frapuccino - Venti, of course. On the bumper of the van was the following statement: "Please don't toss me, I'm full of potato salad."

I'm just not exactly sure what that means. Is it a warning not to run into the van or there could be some serious roadside cleanup? Sort of like those old "Baby on Board" signs people used to hang on their rear windows. I can't honestly say I drove any safer when I saw one of those signs. Of course if I saw a Garfield stuck on the window....Ramming Speed!

But back to the potato salad. Maybe it is from a clever advertising campaign by the local caterer. A bunch of kids looking for trouble at the family picnic decide to throw their old relatives into the lake. When they head for Aunt Clara she yells, "Please don't toss me, I'm full of potato salad!"


"The country is run by extremists because moderates have shit to do!" - Jon Stewart, The Daily Show


Isn't a unicorn just a horse with a horn? And a zebra a horse with stripes? Chick seems to think that unicorns, zebras and horses are all different animals. She says that if a donkey is different from a horse and that if a donkey and a horse make a mule then unicorns and zebras are not horses. I would like to know what would happen if a zebra mated with a donkey? Would it be a striped mule or completely different animal altogether? That answer might solve our dilemma.


I think I need another glass of wine. And where's that sprinkler?