On the Second Day of Baseballius...

I hope everyone enjoyed their opening day festivities. I am sure a few of you celebrated in some way or another. And if you did, then tell me something - isn't Baseballius much better than Easter?

Apparently Pirates exist outside of Pittsburgh. In the news this evening there is a report of a fishing ship being overtaken by pirates off the coast of Somalia. It even managed to escape a chase by the U.S. Navy - of course the Pirates threatened to kill the remaining crew members. And that's not cool. I watched The Pirates of the Carribean just a few nights ago and I don't think anybody died in the whole movie. Of course, half of the cast was already dead. And then I guess they sort of died again. But that was because the British were a bunch of morons. But anyway, new age Pirates aren't cool.

"Anybody with ability can play in the big leagues. But to be able to trick people year in and year out the way I did, I think that was a much greater feat." - Bob Uecker

After the first day of the baseball season, I am not doing well in my fantasy leagues. The Playground Wedgies are in 8th place. The Hooterville Rabble are in 10th place. The Vatican City Hookers are in 5th place. And the Mt. Pilot Moonshine are in 5th place. But I like my teams' names.

Which is more idiotic? When a baseball announcer says "If he would have just hit that a little harder it would have been a Home Run" OR when a football announcer says "If that last guy doesn't tackle him, he would have scored a touchdown?"

I'm not the first person to ask this and I probably won't be the last, but why do baseball coaches wear uniforms? I just saw Bobby Cox of the Braves jog out onto the field to argue with the umpires. The guy is almost 65 years old and he's wearing a jersey with tight pants, stirrups and a pair of cleats. He should have plaid pants with a wide collar shirt, a white belt and a nice pair of loafers. The umpires have to be thinking "look a this old fart in the uniform! He can't hit. He can't pitch. He can't steal a base. And he thinks I'm going to change my call because he's wearing a uniform!?!? What a nut."

"Looking at the ball going over the fence isn't going to help." - Henry Aaron

With the celebration of Baseballius I have been opening many packs of baseball cards. My favorite has to be this year's Topps Bazooka Joe set. Each pack has a special 'blue' card, a super-thick card, a comic strip and a stick of stale gum. It also features many special inserts including stickers, tattoos and uniform cards. I recently received a uniform card for David Wright. That's a card with an actual piece of a game worn jersey attatched to it. He was my top pick for the Mt. Pilot Moonshine. It's a good sign.

"Look at him. He doesn't drink, he doesn't smoke, he doesn't chew and he doesn't stay out late -- and he still can't hit." - Casey Stengel as Yankees manager in 1956, on second baseman Bobby Richardson