This is the day that Banana Kangaroo has been waiting for for quite some time. It was many months ago when she sent away for tickets. Just a few weeks ago they finally arrived. And today is the day that Banana will get to go the CBS studios in Burbank California to see The Price is Right.
Ever since Banana was a little joey she has been watching The Price is Right. She has written to Bob Barker and recieved a signed autograph from the man himself. The framed photo sits on her nightstand and it is the last thing she thinks of everynight filling her head with wonderful dreams. Come on Down! Plinko! A New Car!
Banana's mother does not approve of The Price is Right. She feels that the only game show for a respectable kangaroo is Jeopardy. Banana's grandma is happy for her but wishes she would have gone on The Wheel of Fortune instead. But her father is almost as excited as she is. He has been taking her to the grocery store for months just to practice all the pricing. This morning he had a special gift for her. "What is it daddy?"
"Open it up dear." Banana ripped through the wrapping paper and popped open the box. Inside was a bright red t-shirt with big yellow letters that read MARSUPIALS LOVE BOB.
"Oh daddy, this is perfect!" Banana said as she gave her dad a big hug. "It's just right to get me picked to go up on stage."
"I hope so. Hey, we better get going. I'll drop you off down at the studios."
Banana Kangaroo was still too young to drive. She was only three in human years and that, according to the people at the DMV, is what they go by to determine whether or not you can get a license. She knew that you had to be 18 to go on The Price is Right, but she is actually nineteen and a half in Kanagaroo years. She didn't think the people at CBS would be as strict as the people at the DMV.
"It's time for The Price is Right! Mike Bushman, come on down!" This is the moment Banana had been waiting for. There she was in The Bob Barker Studio sitting among hundreds of people waiting to hear their name!
"Juan Echocheezburrito, come on down!" Banana was jumping and screaming as loud as a Kangaroo could.
"Yolanda Helsinki, come on down!" Banana was hoping and wishing to just hear her name. Sure, there would be more chances but she had to get up their first. She just had to!
"Banana Kangaroo, come on down! You are the first four contestants on The Price is Right!" Oh my god oh my god oh my god oh my god. It took Banana a few seconds to calm down. Then with about two hops she was in the contestants row.
"And here's the star of the show, Bob Baaaaaaaarker!"
There he is. The man of Banana's dreams. Bob. His slick silver hair shined just right. His sharp grey suit and pink tie were just what Banana thought he would wear on their wedding day. But Banana had to stop dreaming now. She had to prepare for the game. This is where she wanted to be. Going last on the first item up for bid was crucial to getting on the stage to meet Bob. She either had to bid one dollar or just one more dollar than someone else.
Writers note - I don't think I can continue with this. This is absolutely ridiculous. If anyone would like to hear the rest of the story, please let me know. I'll finish it.
1 comment:
I'll finish it for you Jim. But I'll make it quick.
Kangaroo gets on stage and does the Mountain Climber game. Because he likes watching the little fucker plummet to his death, he guesses $1,000,000 on the first product. Kangaroo get so excited when the mountain climber falls he jumps up and accidently kicks Bob square in the family jewels. In a rushed panic Barker's Beauties come over, remove his member from his pants and his fuax tiger print thong (Hey- Bob cares about the enviroment) and starts to massage "little Bob" until he is at full attention. This causes every unemployed, uneducated bible beater who lives in a trailer park to call the FCC and complain, resulting in the cancellation of The Price is Right.
I leave it up to the reader to figure out the moral of this story.
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