Questions

If Skeletor, Douglas Adams, Bob Dylan, Mighty Mouse and my dog Elvis were all playing a game of Monopoly, who do you think would win?

If it is 58 degrees with a hard wind and light rain in November, is it better or worse than a 58 degree light wind and hard rain day in April?

Does Miller Lite taste great or is it less filling?

Would Mighty Mouse rather control the three orange properties of St. James Place, Tennessee Avenue and New York Avenue or the four railroads?

Could the Wicked Witch of the West ever go out in the rain? And how did she bathe? Or douche?

If a hockey player scores a goal in the woods does anyone throw a dead squid at him?

If Santa Claus had an affair with a gymnast do the elves ever really need to ask why?

If Bob Dylan had to go directly to jail would he try to stop at GO and collect 200 dollars?

When Leda had sex with the swan, well, what the hell was she thinking?

Would Pablo Picasso be a successful plastic surgeon?

How many lives do you think a cat would use if his tail was stapled to I-75?

If Elvis had to do it all over again, do you think he would have still chosen to die on the shitter?

Follow up: What if he just had the best Grilled-Peanut-Butter-Banana sandwich of his life and it just bunged him up a bit?

Would King Elvis, my dog, rather put a couple of houses on Baltic and Mediterranean avenues or sniff Jack the Cat's ass?

Did you know that googling the word 'Google' causes your computer to giggle?

If Douglas Adams ever reached the end of the galaxy do you think he would be able to get back by taking a ride on the Reading?

Do you realize that for only $8.98 you can own your very own COWBOY BOOTS WESTERN DECOR CEILING FAN LIGHT PULL CHAIN? It's currently listed on ebay for $7.99 but the auction ends in 22 hours and 16 minutes.

Did you know that the phrase 'Vote for Bush' translated from native Wookie is "whoooaaooohhooo"?

Should Skeletor be disqualified or imprisoned for refusing to pay luxury tax?

And finally, after reading this do you think that Otis should give you back ten minutes of your life? Or would a Peanut Butter-Banana Sandwich be enough?